The Best
by israelbauman
Summary: Alternate version of 'Ron Millionare' What if Ron managed to hire a competent Bodyguard?
1. Chapter 1

The Best

A KP Fanfic

A/N: I own no characters in the following tale.

Also: Hobohunter, this story is for you, thank you

for being supportive of my work, it means a lot.

"Hey Ron!"

"Hey KP!"

The usual greeting between friends (and partners) was punctuated with a hug which, was a usual thing that happened every morning Kim dropped by the Stoppable residence, or vice versa. However, this wasn't exactly a normal morning for either teen, Ron especially.

Since he had gotten his Naco Royalty check some four days ago, Ron had been stunned speechless by the sheer amount of zeros on that little slip of paper. But, the speechlessness ended abruptly when Ron realized 1:all that money was his, and 2: there was probably no possible way to spend it all, but he was damn sure going to try.

Or at least he would have had his father not found out. After a series of negotiations that would have put the Yalta Conference to shame, the elder Stoppable managed to get his son to put a sizable portion of his newly found fortune in his care for the time being, leaving Ron with a surplus of twenty million dollars to last his until his twenty-first birthday.

_'This much money, and in effect it's management is a big responsibility,' _Gene Stoppable's voice echoed in his son's head, _'you should be careful, there's going to be an awful lot of people who may want to either take advantage of you, or just take it from you.'_

Ron had been taken aback by that statement, he knew he never would have thought of something like that himself, and he had to give it some consideration. He figured a few things out after a little while. Namely, he figured if his money made him a target (and considering the kind of people that him and KP dealt with on an almost daily basis, that was all too likely) he ought to hire on a body guard, some who could watch his back when Kim couldn't, and maybe give them both a hand on missions.

Ron had Wade help him scope some PMCs (Private Military Contractors) as well as some decent Mercenary Firms. They even looked into Hench Co. mercs (better known as Henchmen) and they all looked good, but Ron wanted the best. He had been about to settle on a team out of Seattle, when wade stumbled across an online add in conjunction with Soldier of Fortune.

It seemed almost too good to be true. Cheap (in comparison to some of the others) highly experienced in all forms of hand to hand combat, bladed weapons, and enemy suppression tactics (lethal and non-lethal) with more than ten years experience. There was no name listed, just a number.

After a few tries Wade managed to get his blond associate in contact with this mysterious man with no name. He accepted the job almost immediately after hearing Ron's name, why so quickly Ron couldn't quite guess, but he almost swore he heard the man mention something about 'a nice easy gig' before he told Ron that he could be in town by Saturday.

Which was the reason he had asked Kim over at the ungodly hour of 8:30 am, so he could introduce her to his newfound one-man protection detail.

Not that Ron didn't need a proper introduction as well, he was set to show up around 9:00am or '0900' as the man put it. The only thing Ron had managed to get out of the mysterious stranger that was soon to shadow him was his codename, and it sure was an odd one. Ron's further musings on the subject were put off by the red head in front of him that would need an explanation as to this recent bout of weirdness.

"Ron," Kim put forth, a bit peeved to be out of bed early on one of the rare days she was able to sleep in, "if I could ask, what's the sitch?"

"Well, you know how I came into, uh, a little money lately?" Ron said slowly

Kim snorted delicately, for someone with no British heritage Ron seemed to have mastered the art of the understatement rather well.

"If you can call nearly 100 million dollars 'little' you bet." she retorted with a smirk.

"Well," Ron began, "dad and I talked, and he told me that some people might hold that against me, plus, since I can afford it, I thought we could use a little back up on missions from time to time..."

Kim halted his train of thought right there. "Oh no! You hired bodyguards?!"

"Just one KP!" Ron interjected, "just one person to stick around in case something bad was going to happen."

Kim was a bit insulted that Ron felt they needed help, a small voice in the back of her head was saying something about Ron being correct, but it was quashed rather quickly. After all, she was Kim Possible, the girl who could do anything, she could protect Ron if he needed it, and missions were her, er, ah, their thing anyway!

"Ron, why do we need help anyway, we can both handle ourselves."

"No KP, you can handle yourself, the Ron man has some work to with the self defense stuff," Ron shrugged, then got a rather sheepish look. "besides, I kinda called you over because, uh, um, I already hired him, and I wanted you with me when he arrived..."

"WHAT!! you just hired someone without telling me or Wade first!"

Ron looked almost offended, "KP, Wade helped me pick him. I didn't want to just hire someone with out some input first."

Kim crossed her arms, Wade was going to catch some serious flak over this one. "So you're meeting this person for the first time today?"

Ron rubbed his neck sheepishly, "yeah."

"And you where is he exactly?" she asked, raising her eyebrow for effect.

"Behind you Miss." An barely accented voice said from directly behind Kim.

Kim whipped around fast enough to give an unprepared human being whiplash to come to bear on this new individual. Kim saw him and had to stop for just a second, the guy was without a doubt, a total hunk, not 'cute' like Mankey, but ruggedly handsome, sort of like the Marlboro man.

He stood at roughly six feet, and a very well muscled 185 pounds or so, and was wearing a black tee shirt and a pair of black BDU cargo pants with some Altama combat boots. The whole ensemble was completed with a nylon flight jacket with the bulge of what could be a large frame pistol near the small of his back. He had what looked like three or four days of stubble, a strong jaw, short messy blond hair, and piercing blue eyes that put the sky to shame. He seemed to be looking past (or considering the height difference, over) her to Ron.

Ron was more surprised than anything else at the sudden appearance of this man, and after the appropriate Ron response (I.e. YELP!!) he realized the older man was in all likelihood the very man he hired, he amended his speech. "Are you uh.. um..." Ron said racking his brain for the man's codename.

He should be able to remember it, it was so unusual...

Suddenly the man drew himself up and put two fingers to his forehead in a type of informal salute and spoke. "Agent HUNK at your service," at this, he smiled a rather jaunty smile.

Kim suddenly had the irrational fear that this guy could read minds when she heard the word 'hunk' pass the mans chapped lips. She almost as quickly put that fear to rest when she realized that he was cocky enough to give himself that codename. 'boy, talk about arrogant' Kim thought to herself, the same voice that told her Ron might be right said something to the tune of the pot calling the kettle black, but she wasn't in the mood to listen, she needed to ask this fella some questions, especially regarding the pistol sized bulge near his belt.

Ron didn't need time to think about anything though, he just jumped headlong into the questioning with something he'd wanted to ask the man since they first spoke, that being:

"So, uh, HUNK, what's your real name, I didn't get to ask you on the phone, and..."

HUNK spoke with an indifferent tone, "I don't think it makes a lot of difference, HUNK is fine."

"I just wondered because I gotta know who to make the check out to." Ron answered truthfully.

HUNK thought for a second before a grin spread across his features. "Well," he began, "my friends call me cash."

And one could almost hear Kim roll her eyes when Ron didn't catch the joke and wrote it down. Kim looked over at the mysterious agent 'HUNK' and after fighting back the urge to drool over him, she started asking him questions.

"Okay HUNK," she started out, "do you have anything else you go by?"

He smiled again, she suspected he knew it made her knees week, and enjoyed doing it to her. "I got another one, but I'm not sure you'll like it."

Kim pursed her lips and gave him an appropriate response. "Now I'd really like to hear it."

HUNK's smile turned a bit feral before returning to a simple smirk. "Mr. Death."

Kim wasn't sure how to counter that statement, fortunately, HUNK choose to finish that statement himself. "The death cannot die." He stated switching to a serious expression.

Ron began to wonder what exactly he had gotten himself into, but despite his lingering doubts, he chose to soldier on through the questions. "So HUNK, we didn't get to talk for long when I called earlier, is there anything you'll need before you start"

HUNK frowned a bit. "Well I was under the impression this was going to be a full time gig, so I was going to get housed here."

Ron's eyes widened a bit, "um, I don't know If that'll work, can't I just give you the cash for a hotel or an apartment maybe?"

HUNK crossed his arms and tilted his head. "In tactical terms that'd be damn near useless."

Ron's firm grip of the English language when nervous or confused allowed him the excellent answer of "huh?"

Oddly, both Kim and HUNK agreed for the first time that day when they both sighed at the same time, but where as Kim stopped, HUNK continued on. "Well, the problem with that plan would be that the nearest apartment complex I spotted on the way in is almost four miles from here, and the hotels are even further away." He paused for a moment. "So, for example, if one of the people you're paying me to protect you against were to break in during middle of the night with the intent to kill or capture you, that means you have to establish communications with me, then I have to grab my gear, get to the truck, and haul ass here ASAP, which is a minimum ETA of six to eight minutes, more than enough time to assassinate you or preform a snatch and grab. See the problem?" HUNK finished.

Kim and Ron looked to each other, then back to HUNK who wasn't wearing the smirk he had most of the conversation, instead he was wearing the mask of a professional. And they both knew he was right.

Ron was a little stunned, but he did give his response. "I didn't think of it like that." HUNK nodded "Few people seem to, in addition to easing all concerned parties worries, it'll make the transition easier too."

Kim and Ron both got a little confused, "What do you mean transition?" Ron spoke up.

HUNK continued on, hardly missing a beat, "well you hired me on as a protection detail, so either covertly or overtly I'll be your shadow 24 hours a day, you'll need time to get used to my tactics, and I'll need some time to familiarize myself with your routine, habits, and so forth."

That sounded reasonable enough to Ron, "Okay, I don't think my folks ought to have too much issue with it when I tell 'em you're here to protect me, we don't have a guest room or anything though, so would the basement work?"

HUNK nodded his approval, "I think so, let me go check it out."

HUNK took the stairs to the basement of the Stoppable residence, and took a good look, it was about what he expected, plain block walls painted white, a coat of battleship grey paint covering the floor, the furnace and water heater near the middle of the floor and the washer and dryer off to the side. There were some boxes and an old green plaid sofa in the corner along with an idling dehumidifier. Nothing special, but it was surprisingly roomy, not too cluttered, clean, and HUNK noted there was plenty of lighting and an abundance of electrical sockets. It wasn't the Ritz, but with some cheap fix up work, a little carpet, and some decent furniture, it wouldn't be half bad, sure beat the hell out the barracks he had on Rockfort in the Training Complex.

Turning to face Kim and Ron, who were standing on the stairwell, he addressed Ron. "I can work with this sir." Ron rubbed the back of his neck, "uh, just Ron is okay HUNK." Ron said.

HUNK chuckled, "I hoped you'd say that, I just need a few minutes to grab my stuff from the truck and get situated." HUNK said while climbing up the stairs, "need any help?" Ron asked. HUNK shook his head, "nah, just grabbing the essentials."

As Kim watched HUNK stretch his arms above his head, she saw his jacket ride up and her suspicions were confirmed when she saw the grip of a large frame automatic pistol stowed neatly at the small of his back in a nylon belt rig. "Do you have to carry that?" she asked.

HUNK turned around with a questioning look, and realized she meant his piece, he reached behind him and Kim tensed slightly as he pulled the gun in question out and aimed it at the floor in his right hand while he pointed to it with his left. "Oh, this? I never go unarmed, and in case you're wondering, the state of Colorado issued me a concealed carry license, it's legal." and before Kim could try to get another word in he tucked the USP* back in it's holster and turned to retrieve his things.

Kim turned to Ron with a hard look (at least as hard as a cute cheerleader can look) "I don't like this Ron" she said with finality.

Ron looked at her with a puzzled look, "he seems okay to me KP, besides Wade did help me pick him out."

"He's carrying a gun!" Kim said incredulously

"He's got a license to, besides he's a bodyguard, and if he was trigger happy or something it would have popped up when Wade ran his background."

"Fine, but we'll talk about this later." Kim said crossing her arms to pout a little.

The next hour or two went on without further incedent, as HUNK unpacked his things and made himself at home so to speak. Kim felt she needed to learn more about this man, and watched him bring in his things from outside, while she stood concealed in the upstairs window of the bathroom.

The first thing she learned was how alert he was when he spotted her spot almost instantly and gave a sly wave before returning to his unpacking. Kim was upset that he spotted her so fast, but she could at least say Ron was getting his money worth, she wouldn't, but she could if she wanted.

She saw he didn't bring too much with him for one thing, just a few duffel bags, a cot, a folding table, and (although it made her feel even more uncomfortable) what looked to be two large weapons cases measuring in at about four feet by one foot by one foot.

Aside from his apparent lack of luggage, there was another thing she was curious about, she expected a guy who had an ego as big as she expected HUNK had would be driving some kind of sports car, or super tacky monster truck type pick up truck, but she was wrong. He was driving a plain white four door SUV, had she known more about vehicles, she would have recognized it as a 1997 Chevrolet Tahoe 4x4. The truck had absolutely no extras on it at all, it was just, _normal. _

Then Kim got the bright idea that she could have Wade feed his license plates through the DMV database. Quickly calling up her tech wizard, she quickly explained her idea.

Wade agreed that he could try so Kim scoped out HUNK's plates, and promptly groaned.

"What is it Kim?" Wade said between draws on his soda.

"The one custom thing on the whole truck, and it's the tags" Kim muttered exasperatedly.

"So what are they?" Wade was curious now.

"Colorado plates, they read 'UZI 4 U'." Kim sighed.

"I'm on it Kim, I'll call back with results."

"Thanks Wade, you rock." Kim said. She saw that HUNK had finished and decided to go back downstairs to hang with Ron and maybe learn some more about the mysterious Mr. Death.

She came back downstairs just in time to watch HUNK emerge from the kitchen with a beer in his hand. He had removed his jacket and now she could also make out several other items on his belt including a pouch for spare pistol mags, a belt loop with zip ties looped around it, an expandable baton, a multi tool, and what looked to be a taser. 'Hmm, he carries his equipment like a cop' Kim thought as she strode over to where HUNK stood next to Ron.

Ron looked over to HUNK and turned his focus to the beer in the gunman's hand. "Uh, dude, is that my dad's beer?" Ron queried, thinking that his parents were going to be unhappy enough to have HUNK staying with them, without his bodyguard raiding his father's beer supply.

HUNK shock his head, "Nah, I don't like Coors Light." he said holding his bottle up a bit for emphasis, "I got a twelve pack of Corona on the drive in."

Ron shrugged, "oh, anyway I was about to fire up the 'ol Game Box for a little Zombie Mayhem and Kim doesn't play video games, care to join me?"

HUNK chuckled a little in a kind of cynical way before answering. "Nah, I've had enough of the undead, have you got Everlot?"

Ron looked at his bodyguard unbelievably for a second. "You play?"

HUNK shrugged, "a coworker of mine got me hooked on it, the bastard."

Ron smiled, "I'll get another controller." Right as Ron began to get up, the unmistakable chime of the Kimmunicator went off, Kim answered immediately.

"What's the sitch Wade?" she said silently hoping he found something on HUNK's real name.

"Drakken again Kim, he's in Uperton right now trying to steal some parts from right under Dementor's nose" Wade summarized.

Kim sighed, "alright, we're on it. Do you have a ride for us?"

Wade shook his head, "it's only 25 miles, and no ones available locally."

HUNK already had a bag slung over his shoulder and looked ready to move when he spoke up. "I can handle a little drive, suit up and meet me in the truck." He stated before double-timing it out the door.

Wade shrugged over the Kimmunicator's screen. "That handles that."

Kim gave Wade a look, "by the way, did you scope out his tags?"

Wade shook his head again, "haven't found it yet, let me run it in the national system, and I'll get back to you."

"Thanks Wade." Kim said signing off. She called out for Ron and told him to move.

Five minutes later, both teens exited the Stoppable residence geared up and headed toward HUNK's Tahoe. They found him behind the wheel already in his own form of mission gear.

He threw on a BDU jacket to go with his pants, as well as kneepads, elbow pads, and a Kevlar vest. Completing this new look was a balaclava and a helmet. But oddly enough, he also included a gas mask with curious red eye lenses. Kim and Ron had to admit, he certainly looked intimidating if nothing else, kind of like a cross between a special forces commando, and a SWAT team point man.

Ron shot for the front seat before Kim could stop him, and soon she found herself strapped into the middle of the back seat. She took in the interior of the GM built SUV and suddenly knew why the exterior looked so plain, he put all the work into building up the inside.

It had a storm console, similar to one you might find in a patrol car complete with the laptop PC and all, a partition divider between the back seat and the cargo area that doubled as a roll bar, and and what looked to be a gun rack hanging on said divider with a Remington 870 as well as an H&K G36 assault rifle locked into it.

HUNK pealed away from the curb hard enough for her and Ron to realize he spent some significant money on the drive train too. They could feel HUNK smirk under his gas mask as he cut off a white Jaguar XK8 Kim thought looked a lot like Bonnie Rockwaller's. It was at that moment that the currently masked gunman spoke up.

"You nice kids look like you could use some music, how about some tunes?" HUNK then slid a CD he had in the console into the trucks stereo, and the sounds of high energy southern metal filled the truck.

_Woah Black Betty  
__Bama Lamb_

Go Black Betty  
Bama Lamb

Black Betty Had A Child  
Bama Lamb

Damn Thing Gone Wild  
Bama Lamb

Shes Always Ready  
Bama Lamb

Shes All Rock Steady  
Bama Lamb

Woah Black Betty  
Bama Lamb

Go Black Betty  
Bama Lamb

All Right! 

Kim wasn't the Spiderbait type but it was too loud to complain, she looked into the front seat and noticed HUNK nodding along slightly to the music and surprisingly, so was Ron who shot a thumbs up to the other two occupants of the car.

Kim appreciated the lift and all, but if this was going to continue, she needed to talk to HUNK about his taste in music, but then thought again. It was highly unlikely HUNK would share her love of Justin Timberlake, besides, if he did, well, that would just be freaky.

All meandering thoughts aside, she thought that HUNK seemed professional enough, she just hoped he would be up to handling the likes of Shego...

To Be Continued...

Authors Note: Hoped you enjoyed it! I think I got everyone in character enough, drop a review and tell me what you all think. Stay tuned for the next chapter, where we see everyone's favorite green and blue duo handle the mysterious Mr. Death.

Best Wishes,

Israelbauman

Additional: *The USP is a full size semi-automatic handgun made in Germany by H&K, the same people who make the MP5 Family of sub-machine guns, HUNK's particular model is a USP Tactical in nine millimeter, the Tactical nine millimeter model has an extended barrel to mount a silencer, as well as better sights, and it's been accurized.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: I Own Nothing

The drive into Uperton was almost over when Kim tapped Ron on the shoulder and told him over the noise of the music that she needed to talk to Wade to confirm Drakken's location, HUNK hit the off control on the stereo, and the silence was a welcome rest, at least to Kim's battered ears.

She leaned back into her seat and picked up the Kimmunicator punching the call key bringing Wade's face into view, "hey Kim, I'm tracking Your location now, Drakken's still on site, I'm sending the coordinates." With that, the display reverted to a real time GPS screen, with the Tahoe as a solid Green dot, and Drakken's current location was marked as a blinking red dot about four miles ahead, near the outskirts of the city.

Ron looked to HUNK and spoke, "you know, we should ask Wade to get you a Kimmunicator." With that said HUNK reached into the console and removed a small cell phone like device, it was black and measured about four inches by two inches.

HUNK snuck a look at Kim in the back seat, "Miss Possible, could you hand that thing to Ron?" Kim shrugged and did as asked, Ron held the device up and HUNK held his small comm device next to it and pushed one of the buttons under the plasma display, an hourglass icon came up and within a couple seconds the icon was replaced with a copy of the Kimmunicator screen.

Locking his comm into a charging cradle and letting it sync up to his laptop, whose screen was then replaced with the same GPS screen shown by the comm. Kim stared at the black clad gunman who routed his way through her Kimmunicator's security so easily, he was good. HUNK spoke up to give an explanation as he kicked out the rear end of the Tahoe to take a sharp corner. "I got my own stuff, most of it's leftovers from some of the more, financially well endowed people I've worked for over the years, that little gadget I just showed you came from my previous employer, same place that rifle came from too." at that HUNK pointed behind him to the G36 locked into it's rack behind Kim's head.

"Approaching location" came Wade's voice through the Kimmunicator and laptop speakers all at once. The trio looked through the windshield of the SUV and immediately saw where the GPS beacon was leading them, they were fast approaching the warehouse district, and although the warehouses all appeared similar, no one with half a brain could mistake the recently-made gaping hole in the roof of one of the more secure looking facilities, and the green hovering vehicle parked directly above it.

HUNK let out a low whistle, "That hovercraft belongs to a guy you beat on regularly? The guy's got a healthy mind, a healthy bank account or both." Kim and Ron both looked over at the merc and nodded, that seemed to be a decent description of the blue man alright, except for maybe the part about a 'healthy' mind.

"My screen says you're at the site guys, good luck!" Wade said as HUNK pulled the Tahoe into an alleyway two buildings away for cover. "Thanks Wade, you rock!" answered Kim, "hnk, thanks!" added Rufus sticking his head out of Ron's pocket. "Don't worry, I'll make sure they don't get killed." said HUNK for good measure. Kim had the presence to look a bit annoyed at HUNK before they piled out of the truck into the industrial decay of the alleyway.

"Alright," HUNK started before Kim could say much, causing her further annoyance, "I've never really seen how you two work in person before, so I'll hang back and observe for now, you two do your thing and I'll keep an eye out for 'ya." Both Kim and Ron nodded their agreement, especially Kim, who was looking forward to showing the gunman that she knew a thing or two about tact in an operation too.

HUNK reached into the back seat of the truck and retrieved the Remington 870 he had stowed on the gun rack and slung the weapon under his shoulder in a tactical carry position. "Once again, do you really need to carry artillery?" Kim asked him. HUNK let out a sigh, "Look young lady, I may be a mercenary for hire, but that doesn't mean I'm a blood thirsty killer, look." HUNK gripped the twelve gauge and pumped the action, ejecting a shell from the chamber and held it up.

Kim had little experience with firearms and when she did encounter shotgun shells, they were almost always red, this particular one was clear plastic with a single round black projectile inside. "See?" HUNK continued, "rubber slug, non-lethal but it hurts like a mother, I don't like hurting people unless I have to, now you two best get moving." With that, HUNK turned and double-timed it down the alley and round the back of the buildings.

Kim just stood there for a second before turning to look at Ron, "Who'd you hire him again?"

Ron shrugged, "he makes me feel a little safer?" the blond ventured.

"Let's just get moving" Kim huffed, and thus, they were off.

HUNK thought he had made pretty good time to the back or the warehouse, he liked to be ahead of schedule, and according to what he saw, he made it to the building before his charge and Miss Possible had, 'huh, Possible.' he thought, she seemed to be a bit tetchy around him, probably felt threatened or some crap like that.

HUNK smiled beneath his mask, wouldn't be the first time someone felt threatened by someone who knew field work as well as he did, he briefly remembered when he first meet Whiskers, (although even HUNK wasn't quite insane enough to call the blond haired sociopath that to his face, there was a difference between brave and insanely stupid) He wondered what the triple-crosser was up to these days, didn't really matter anyway, HUNK may have worked for the highest bidder, but he still had some honor left. Once he took a contract, come hell or high water, he finished it out with gusto, he never betrayed a client, and he didn't like to work for people who considered it fair to toss their employees and colleagues to the wolves, after all, he quit working for the corporation for a reason.

Normally emotions and internal dialog he saved for after an operation, but this was an exception. This Drakken guy was either extremely arrogant, aloof (considering evil villain types, that was fairly likely) or a bumbling moron, and after looking at the tech involved in building something like that hover car, HUNK was all but ready to rule that one out.

But still, this was pathetic, he had no guards posted, no remote sentries, and no electronic interference. It seemed as though the good doctor was preforming nothing more than a smash-and-grab, HUNK shook his head, the last time someone had him go on an operation like that, his damn team got killed, and the viral specimens they were sent to collect got loose. Not to mention that it was the direct cause of thousands of deaths, which was one of the other reasons working for the corporation became unappealing.

Upon hearing the noise of a door being kicked in, (the kids sure didn't seem to like subtle, a part of the gunman's brain noted) he turned to get a look inside, he saw Ron looking surprisingly relaxed, Miss Possible looking determined, and they were facing toward their enemy, who just happened to be...

HUNK suddenly became something he wasn't very often, surprised. Then a smile crept on to his face, "my, my, my." he said to himself, "Of all the places..."

Kim and Ron had made it to the walk-in door, and prepared to make their grand entrance, they scouted the front and sides of the building and saw nothing, Wade couldn't pick up any thing on the scope, so with a nod of agreement, the two teens kicked open the door, and jumped inside to confront Drakken's forces.

To their mild surprise, Shego seemed to be the only one present, normally there'd be at least a dozen henchmen running around, loading equipment, checking for intruders, looking menacing, whatever it is that henchmen do. As they arrived, they happened to hear the last part of a conversation between the green-hued woman and her equally odd-toned boss.

"I told you Doctor D, I can't find your do-hickey..."

"The Plasmatic Core Modulation Device Shego! Just call it a PCMD if you can't remember it's proper name!" shouted the tinny, but still somehow menacing voice of one Dr. Drew 'Drakken' Lipsky over the radio.

"Yeah well, whatever the hell you want to call it, I can't spot..." SMASH!!! The clattering of the newly defunct outside doorway diverted any further conversation on Shego's behalf, "Hold up Doc, we got incoming."

"Kim Possible again!" He shouted.

"And her pet buffoon, I'll be up in a jiffy." With that Shego tossed the radio back behind her, upon hearing it shatter against the far wall, she transferred into a fighting position, and stood at the ready.

Kim tensed up, and got prepared to dish out some rage, after one day of dealing with Ron's new 'bodyguard' she needed to loose some frustration on someone who deserved it, and Shego was always an appealing target.

Ron had other ideas though, he had entered 'negotiator' mode, and felt the need to try something.

"Hey Shego?" Ron called out, Kim gave him a look that clearly questioned his sanity, but he retorted with a muttered "trust me for a sec here KP."

"What is it buffoon?" Shego called back in a rather impatient tone of voice.

"Well," Ron began, "you always say Drakken doesn't give you enough credit for what you do for him right?"

"Get to the point Stoppable, before I make you stop babbling myself!" Shego snapped

Ron gulped, and Kim was quite sure he gone off the deep end to even begin trying to placate the volatile woman. "I was wondering if maybe you'd care to work for us in exchange for a healthy fee?"

Kim suddenly had the near insatiable urge to cause irreparable bodily harm to her best friend, the damn smug masked gunman was bad enough, but Shego! Now this was going too damn far!

Kim never got to chastise Ron though, Shego was faster on the draw when it came to insults and witty banter, "Oh yeah right! What are you going to pay me in? Sunshine and happy stories?!" Shego was in her openly mocking bitchy mode, and the fact that she thought Ron was so full of crap his eyes were turning a darker shade of brown helped.

"Hey, the Ron man has the fundage to pay up, at least now that I'm worth some SERIOUS coinage." He added, promptly ignoring Shego's outburst.

"Kimmie," Shego started, not knowing to laugh or rip off Ron's wedding tackle and shove it in his mouth just to shut him up, "I think all that garbage you're letting him shovel down his gullet is starting to effect his brain."

"He's not lying Shego," Kim ground out, despite wishing to pound her toe-headed companion of some twelve years, "he did get more than enough cash to go straight to his head." She added as Ron stood smirking in triumph.

"Really?" Shego's greedy side was interested now, and that was practically NEVER a good thing, "how much are we talking about Mister Stoppable?"

Ron smiled, "that 'garbage' I was a shovelin' down my neck, as you put it is sort of responsible for my current financial, ugh, goodness."

Shego raised an eyebrow, "really?"

Ron nodded, "you've heard of the Naco? I created it." He said smugly.

Shego felt her eyes widen a touch, no wonder the kid was loaded! Even Dr. D had a love of those stupid things. "Damn, that's like having the inventors rights to the Whopper!"

Ron nodded, "so you know I'm good for it, so how about you give up the whole trying to kill us thing, and get paid to work with us? I bet we could even get Dr. Director to let go some of the bad stuff you've done?"

Shego smiled a caustic grin, "sorry, as much as I like to bitch about the big blue dork he's basically a decent guy, besides, I don't think I could bear the strain of working with Princess on a daily basis, but I would love to take you up on the offer to take your money, all of it sound fair enough?"

Ron had exactly enough time to have his eyes widen before Shego was on top of him and had him in a headlock, she was about to bade Kimmie a fond farewell and grab the rope ladder leading to the hovercraft when all individuals present heard a shotgun being racked, and a voice, one Shego was less than pleased to hear spoke up from about four yards behind her.

"Well, it's been a while Shego, where was the last place we got a chance to shoot the breeze? Prague? Moscow?" HUNK asked in a mild, wandering tone.

Shego tossed Ron back at Kim's feet, suddenly the prospect of stealing dear Stoppable's cash seemed minute compared to having a brawl with the man behind her. She began to speak as she slowly turned to face the man. "No, it was Cleveland HUNK, we were in Cleveland." Shego finished in a dangerously low tone of voice.

HUNK chuckled at the woman's anger, he didn't seem to care. "Ahh... I always seem to get those three mixed up, funny huh?"

Shego responded by lighting up both of her fists and growling, HUNK cut her off by dropping the rubber-slug loaded Remington and withdrawing his USP (which was loaded with live, lethal 147 grain Hydra-Shock Hollow Points) and pointing it firmly between her eyes. "Shego, let's not play this game, the last time you got into a tizzy I walked away with third-degree burns, and you had to have a couple pistol slugs pulled out of your person, what do you say we live and let live?" he finished with his head cocked to the side in a way that could be considered adorable on anyone but a trained killer.

Shego growled again, "I'd rather live and let die"

Kim had completely quit caring about what Ron had done at this point and coincidentally, so had Ron, they were both far more interested in Ron's bodyguard and Shego were talking about, and why they seemed to know each other so well. Surprisingly, Kim was the one to interrupt their chat, (that kind of tactless behavior was usually Ron's forte) "Excuse me." Kim asked politely, she got a sharp glance from both. "What?!" they both said at once, Ron looked as though he wanted to call a jinx but decided against it out of personal safety. Kim cleared her throat and asked the million dollar question: "So, do you two know each other?"

HUNK seemed to be smiling under that damn mask again, and everyone could tell, Shego particularly didn't like the idea he was smiling. "Don't you _dare_ you bastard!" Shego said in a tone so horrible no one even recognsed it, including Drakken, who had been listening in from the hovercraft just fifty feet overhead. Well, _almost_ everyone, HUNK seemed to know, and he was loving it. "Oh, I know her alright, in about every way a man can know a woman."

there was silence for a moment, just a mere second where the silence was deafening, then, Shego erupted like Mount Saint Helen.

"YOU ASSHOLE!!" Kim and Ron watched as Shego erupted and did her damnedest to kill the man in black in front of them. It was certainly like no fight Kim ever had with the emerald skinned woman, she seemed to be far more quick, and more deadly, yet HUNK could match her step for step, and didn't hold back, it was a true dead heat.

About four minutes into the debacle, about the time that Ron wished he had his camcorder, was when the wail of police sirens were heard from every direction. Shego recognized the danger for what it was and had a difficult choice to make, continue trying to kill HUNK, or avoid capture, she choose the latter. Faking out of the last punch, Shego threw herself at the rope ladder in the middle of the floor, and screamed a final insult at HUNK consisting of allowing his love spuds to meet the business end of a lit fist and was gone before the hammer dropped.

And that just left Ron, Kim and Rufus speechless, and an oddly reminiscent HUNK, just before the authorities reached them HUNK had one thing to say, he sighed "god I love that woman."


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I own Nothing

"Okay, I think we all need to have a chat." Kim said with finality, directing her question at HUNK specifically. They had just gotten finished having a chat with the local authorities, granted it was a bit more tense, the deputies were expecting Team Possible, they got Team Possible plus black-clad mercenary.

It was a bit tense at first but both HUNK and Ron explained the situation, and after the police checked HUNK's permits to carry and protection licenses, they seemed to relax a great deal. Of course they had the usual questions, the previously mentioned question came up as soon as the truck was headed down the interstate toward Middleton (thankfully at a slower clip than the ride to the job) and HUNK sighed in response.

"I take it you mean the thing about Sheena?" HUNK started. Kim felt her eyebrow raise, and Ron's eyes got wide. "Sheena?" Kim asked.

HUNK nodded, "Yep, Shena Goizargi, that's her real name, but very few people know that one."

Ron nodded to him "I'll bet"

Kim looked at Ron having interrupted her, and then to HUNK, "so how come we've never heard her real name before?"

HUNK shrugged, "probably because you didn't need to know it, you just stop her when she tries something, it's not like you're actively hunting her."

"Still, we should tell Dr. Director about this." Kim concluded.

"You mean Betty?" HUNK asked, "she knows."

Both teens looked at the gunman with gob-smacked expressions. "Okay, one, how do you know Dr. Director, and two, what do you mean she already knows?" Kim managed to get out, Ron had no interest in talking at the current moment, he was still a bit jumpy over what happened in the warehouse, (and no matter what Kim said, he was keeping HUNK on retainer for as long as he could, he shuddered to think what would have happened had HUNK not been there)

HUNK chuckled at Kim's tone, she actually thought she sounded intimidating! "To answer your first question, I've had a few run-ins with the UN's 'premiere' law enforcement division, to put it lightly, I'm far from impressed, as for the second, Shena mentioned that the good Doctor managed to finagle her oldest brother into passing on her given name, let's just say that Shena and her parents were... less than pleased that Hego sold her out."

Ron actually spoke up after hearing that one, "her own brother sold her out?" Ron asked incredulously.

Even Kim had to admit that was a little cold.

HUNK shook his head, "Hego probably thought he was helping her out, trying to bring her in for 'her evil misdeeds' or however he puts it, Shena didn't quite see it that way I guess." HUNK chuckled.

"What happened?" Kim asked (though she was fairly certain she already had a rough idea)

"Hego had some trouble sitting down for the next few weeks." HUNK concluded as both teens grimaced.

Always one to take the most obvious path in a conversation, Ron spoke. "So I take it from the uh... talk with Shego in the warehouse that you two were an item once?"

HUNK nodded, "we made a hell of a pair, to this day that was the longest relationship I've had outside of working ones"

Kim was curious about that, "how long?"

"Almost fourteen months" was the masked man's response.

Kim gave HUNK an 'are-you-kidding-me' look, from the backseat, and HUNK sent her a piercing glare from the rear view mirror. "Miss Possible, you need to understand something, I'm a mercenary, I go where I'm needed for as long as I'm needed. A personal relationship that lasts longer than two days is a miracle in my line of work."

Kim reluctantly nodded, she had a taste of work getting in front of life, hell, she was on the way back from one such interruption right now! "So you actually got along with that woman at one point?" Kim said, trying to continue on with the forty questions.

"You've got that right, we had the occasional disagreement, but on the whole we were okay. It was kind of funny how it ended though, we got in an argument over the dinner, things were said, names were called, shots and plasma were fired, and the rest is history."

Kim and Ron were both wide-eyed at how this man could be so blah-se about what he referred to as his longest relationship ever?

"So, Goizargi huh? What kind of name is that?" Ron beat Kim in asking this one, she didn't argue though, she really wanted to know herself.

"Basque actually, her daddy's a Spaniard, her momma's half French and Vietnamese, weird family" HUNK concluded shaking his head.

"That is awfully... diverse" Kim said.

"Yeah, I'm surprised she doesn't snap at you two in Vietnamese more often considering how much of a pain you are to her." HUNK concluded as he swerved around a Micro Car in the carpool lane.

"Wait, she knows something other than English?" Ron said looking bewildered.

HUNK snorted "all mercenaries know more than one language. She speaks English, French, Vietnamese, and you know she's getting pissy if she breaks into Spanish."

Kim was curious enough to ask, "So you know some other languages too?"

HUNK nodded, "that's actually one of the things we didn't get along on, the only one we have in common is English."

Ron pressed on, "So which ones do you know?"

"I'm fluent in Russian, Arabic, and German"

Kim kept getting surprised at HUNK, the man was clearly more complicated then he seemed.

"That's an odd list." Ron surmised, and HUNK shook his head and sighed, one more thing to explain to the duo...

"When I first started out in the nineties, the collapse of the Soviet Union was still somewhat fresh,and I did a lot of work in Eastern Europe, the former Soviet satellite states, Serbia, Croatia, Bosnia, Chechnya, all the major ones. I did some contract work in north Africa, I've been to some serious hellholes in my time, where I specialized those were the most frequent tongues spoken." HUNK concluded with a blank expression, 'at least before the Corporation scouted me,' he added mentally, he decided that the kids didn't need to hear that one.

Kim knew that mercenaries traveled to some bad spots, but HUNK was right, those were some spots that few people would ever willingly go, she was curious as to why someone with HUNK's experience would pick a job guarding someone like Ron, but said person interrupted her thoughts.

"Well anyway," Ron said, "what was it that broke up you and Shego?" As curious as he was toward HUNK's background, he was very curious why someone would rid themselves of a girl as gorgeous as Shego.

HUNK was happy at Ron's question, it was a little less dangerous to get into than things concerning his background. "Well, the usual things, objections over work, not being able to see each other enough, and then there was the big one..."

Kim spoke up this time, "What's was that?"

HUNK gestured toward the hood of the Tahoe, "well, in case you haven't noticed, I'm driving something GM built."

Ron picked up on it first, "you guys broke up over what you drive?!" Ron couldn't keep the incredulous look off of his face, and when Kim heard that she was mirroring the same expression.

HUNK shrugged, "One of the few things we couldn't agree to disagree over, she is a dyed in the blue Ford lover."

"I never figured Shego to be the mechanical type." Kim questioned.

"She's a complex woman." HUNK said simply. Both teens just nodded.

"well, I think that's enough questions about my ex-girlfriend for now, how about some music?" HUNK stated, effectively ending the conversation.

Kim groaned quietly as HUNK slid another disk from his center console into the SUV's stereo.

Soon, the oddest song Kim had ever heard in her life began to play at high volume, it sounded like a mixture of a mariachi band and heavy metal and the lyrics were all in Spanish:

_Hey amigos . . ._

_Adelante amigos . . ._

Vamos vamos mi amor

Me gusta mucho tu sabor

No no no no tu corazón

Mucho mucho tu limón

Dame de tu fruta

Vamos mi amor . . .

Te quiero puta!

Te quiero puta!

_Ay que rico _

Being that Kim took French, she didn't know too much about what the artist was screaming about, but she knew it wasn't pleasant considering the look on Ron's face (he took the Spanish elective) he had a somewhat red complexion as he turned to look at HUNK.

* * *

HUNK looked back and chuckled a little. "It kind of reminds me of her a little bit..."

Ron and HUNK arrived at the Stoppable household shortly after word, having dropped off Kim on the way back. Ron's parents were home so both men climbed out of the Tahoe and prepared to explain to them why a Merc was going to be staying with them.

Ron entered the home first with HUNK right on his heels, they found both elder Stoppable's in the living room, Ron spoke first before they noticed him.

"Mom, Dad, I need to talk to you about something..."

And it was certainly a shock when both parents turned around to say hello, and saw their son standing next to a six foot tall man dressed in black tactical gear that was armed.

After some quick explanations, specifically who HUNK was, he was finally able to introduce the them.

"Guys, this is HUNK, HUNK, these are my parents." Ron said carefully, nodding to both parties.

Mr. Stoppable moved foreword and carefully extended his hand, "I'm Gene Stoppable and," he gestured toward his wife, "this is Ronald's mother, Jean."

HUNK restrained from chuckling at the same-name thing diplomatically and introduced himself, "HUNK, pleasure to meet you Mr. And Mrs. Stoppable."

"So my son hired you on as a protection detail?" Gene asked.

"Yes sir, as well as back up for him and Miss Possible should the need arise." HUNK answered, and noticed that Mrs. Stoppable seemed... happy about that? 'maybe the protective type...' he thought.

"Well we would like to discuss some matters with you if you're going to be following my son around." Gene said, HUNK nodded in agreement.

"To be expected, sir, let's get to it," HUNK nodded as the four sat down in the kitchen to talk terms.

It didn't take long for the negotiations to be concluded, in which time Mr. & Mrs. Stoppable found that despite his career choice, (and rather dubious code names) HUNK seemed like a good man, and he was certainly well qualified to watch out for their son's wellbeing, as well as that of his best friend. In turn, HUNK found the Stoppables to be decent enough people, he certainly enjoyed working for someone decent for once (although anyone but the most deranged of individuals fit that bill after some of the people he worked for).

After word, the Stoppables retired to the living room to talk some more while HUNK retreated to the the Tahoe to fetch some more of his belongings.

On the way back in, Mr. Stoppable noticed HUNK's truck and a small realization popped into his head.

"Excuse me, HUNK?"

The mercenary in question turned around, "yes?"

"That white Chevy is yours, right?" Gene asked.

"Yes sir, do you need it moved?" HUNK asked back.

"No, no, nothing like that, but I was wondering, did you intentionally pick a white vehicle?"

HUNK wasn't quite sure why that was important, and shrugged, "White's easy to keep clean, and it's inconspicuous, why do you ask?"

Gene smiled a bit, "I thought it might be a play on your name."

"Huh?"

Gene recited a quote, "and I looked and behold, a pale horse, and his name that sat on him was death, Revelations I think."

HUNK smiled back, "well, I never thought about that, why do you know Revelations though? That's New Testament, I thought you were Jewish?"

Gene nodded, "I am, but it doesn't mean I can't read, I've also read the Koran and the Bhagavad Gita, I like to know other peoples views too."

HUNK nodded, "I need to catch up on my reading."

"You should, it's very rewarding" Gene said.

HUNK stretched out his arms and folded them behind his head, "I'm going to my quarters to unpack my things, call me if you need anything."

Gene nodded, and as HUNK walked away Gene had a thought about that Revelations quote, 'I sure hope Hell doesn't follow him.'

It was about 10:00 pm when Ron meandered his way to the basement to see how the unpacking was going, and saw that HUNK had set himself up well.

He had a couple of folding tables set up, with a cot along the wall, and a foot locker at the end of it. He also had their old couch set up in the near his cot, with an overturned milk crate in front of it, on which sat HUNK's laptop, a practically new Toshiba ToughBook, which currently had the Media Player running. Ron could hear what sounded like a mixture of chamber and elevator music played on piano (1) Ron didn't know what it was, but it sounded peaceful. Although the oddest thing was an old typewriter sitting on top of a large... well, it wasn't another footlocker, and it didn't look like a hope chest, the only name that seemed to fit was Item box.

Ron spotted HUNK sitting at the first card table, he had a M4 A1 carbine (2) layed out that he was in the midst of stripping down for inspection, and had several firearms to his right that looked to be next, a IMI Desert Eagle in .50 caliber, a Steyr TMP, an HK MP5 with a flashlight in the fore end, and a full-size Remington 1100 shotgun.

Ron looked wide-eyed at the artillery and HUNK looked up from cleaning the rifle at his charge, "Hello Ron, need anything?"

Ron shook his head, "no I just wanted to see how you were doing, you know that's a lot of guns, those are all legal right?"

HUNK nodded, "I've got permits for all of them, I have a friend in the BATF who helped push the paperwork through"

Ron breathed a sigh of relief and had to ask another question, "HUNK, why are you cleaning those? I didn't see you shoot anything today?"

HUNK smiled, "rule number 1 in this job: if you take care of your equipment, it takes care of you, so I check them over every night, and clean them all every 5 days or whenever their fired, whichever comes first"

Ron nodded, he tried to take care of his mission gear as best as possible, it helped to be prepared. HUNK waved him over and Ron stepped forward.

"I'd like to go to the range tomorrow, you need to practice to be in top form, and I'll need to try to get some more furnishings for this place if this is going to be my quarters for some time."

Ron agreed and thought of something, Kim wouldn't like it, but then again they didn't agree on everything, and this might be fun... "HUNK, if you wouldn't mind, could I go the range with you? I've never shot anything before, and it might be kinda' fun..."

HUNK thought about it for a second and nodded, "sure, I've never gotten the chance to instruct anyone before, it might be interesting."

Ron smiled, "thanks, I'd better be going to bed..." then Ron noticed a picture on the edge of HUNK's table, it wasn't hard to miss, it was the only photograph there. "HUNK who're those people?"

HUNK looked at the picture and chuckled loudly, "that was taken a few years back, I was in a little hell hole in Thailand called Roanapur. Take a look and see if there's anyone you recognize."

Ron looked closely, it was in a bar, a real seedy place by the looks of it, to the left there was an enormous black man wearing sunglasses and a green vest smoking a cigarette, and a thin man in a Hawaiian shirt with blond hair and glasses looking bored.

To the middle there was a thin man in a t-shirt that read 'kiss me I'm French' with an eye-patch and a mane of red hair that reached the small of his back in a ponytail involved in a drinking contest with a gorgeous auburn haired woman in a tank-top and Daisy Duke shorts with a pair of chrome Beretta pistols in a shoulder rig.

And off to the left was a man in black cargo pants and boots and a tan t-shirt that was obviously HUNK and a long raven haired woman in hip-hugger jeans and a tank top with her arm wrapped around HUNK possessively that looked a lot like...

"Shego!" Ron blurted out surprised, HUNK chuckled some more.

"Yeah, that's her, we were both in the area on business and when we finished, we meet up in Roanapur for a little R&R, that was a helluva' trip." HUNK said looking almost reminiscent.

"So who are all the other folks there?" Ron asked.

"Well," HUNK said, "The big black guy with the shades is Dutch, the guy in the Hawaiian shirt is Benny, the only other blond haired Jew I've ever meet..."

"Hey!" Ron exclaimed.

HUNK held up his hands "I'm not making fun of your people, just saying that Jewish people with blond hair are kinda rare."

"Oh," Ron said, a little embarrassed for the outburst, "sorry."

HUNK shook his head, "don't apologize, you thought I was belittling your people, you had the right to be offended. Anyway, in the middle there, the French guy with the ponytail and the eye-patch is Pip, his crew and I did some work together in Northwestern Africa. The chick he's trying to drink under the table with the pistols is Revy 'two hands', and don't let the skimpiness fool you, she's deadlier than she looks."

"And the last two are you and Shego?" Ron interrupted.

"Yep, Like I said, that was one hell of a trip." HUNK concluded.

"You must have done some interesting things in your life HUNK." Ron said

* * *

HUNK smiled a little, "you have no idea."

Author's Note:

Sorry for the wait, I've been reading too much fan fiction and not writing enough of it. I'll try to be faster next time.

Anyone who's played Resident Evil 2 should be familiar with this melody, if you don't remember, I'll give you a hint, it's played in the police precinct in the dark room 1st floor, and the receptionist's office 2nd floor. Here's the youtube address of it : .com/watch?v=53aDI5K49F4

All of HUNK's weapons from the table are the real life equivalents of those in RE2 (except the M4A1, that was from RE3: Nemesis

One other thing, the song playing in the Tahoe is Rammstein's 'Te Quiero Puta!' look up the English translation of this song (if you don't speak Spanish) to see what had Ron so scandalized.


End file.
